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Jun 07, 2019 20:36:00

on the outskirts of life

by @lucjah PATRON | 212 words | 74🔥 | 351💌

Lucjah

Current day streak: 74🔥
Total posts: 351💌
Total words: 96690 (386 pages 📄)

"Oh Bob..."

"What honey?"

"I feel so off today..."

"I'm sorry. Is there anything I can do?"

"Thank you, I don't think so..."

"What is it?"

"I feel drained... It's just been too much for me. All of that..."

"Yes, I know my love. I am drained myself. It was a lot for everybody."

"I always think, I am ok, only afterwards I realise how big was an impact of a situation... It's like that EVERY TIME! Cannot I learn? Have I no imagination? What is it, that makes me always underestimate life and overestimate my powers?"

"My darling... but I think it's very common. Look around, so many people doing the same. Look at your mom... and mine... and Sylwia, and Krysia, and.... well... me of course..."

"Yes, I know... Only it seems that others can do so much before they get exhausted, and I can do so little... almost nothing! IT IS SO FRUSTRATING!"

"My poor baby..."

"Sometimes I feel like an invalid. Just looking at the world spinning around while I'm sitting somewhere on the outskirts, tired... "

"But that's not true! You do so much. And you are so wonderful! And I am so happy to be with you!"

"Thank You <3"

"And remember, you can always call Hana..."



  • 1

    @philh your post from yesterday... I loved it, unpublic it and LET IT BE <3

    Lucjah avatar Lucjah | Jun 09, 2019 00:07:12
  • 1

    @lucjah - <3

    Brian Ball avatar Brian Ball | Jun 07, 2019 20:04:36
  • 1

    @lucjah Are you tired? I'd always imagined 200wad gives you some type of energy boos :D

    Gabriel Greco avatar Gabriel Greco | Jun 07, 2019 23:27:19
    • 1

      @gabrielgreco maybe this
      https://200wordsaday.com/words/depression-the-leading-cause-of-suicide-it-s-about-bipolar-anyway-197475cfd0f006a446
      gives a bit of explanation...
      but also recently the quick posts don't work well for me, so when I have no time to dig and ponder, I feel somehow frustrated.. also I have these streaks of boring factual pieces... i research a topic that i realise I'd like to know a bit more, and then post a bit of that, though it possibly isn't interesting for anybody else... so, it serves a purpose, well, it's 2 in 1 actually, yet it does not energize, it actually drains a bit... Not sure why... dullness of presentation perhaps...?

      Lucjah avatar Lucjah | Jun 10, 2019 16:21:45
    • 1

      @lucjah I see where you're coming from now. I've never been diagnosed with anything but doing a bit of this and then a bit of that is kinda my specialty. And I agree it is draining, I think it's because when you take bits and pieces you forego the pleasure/sense of achievement associated with completion...so it feels like you're forever chasing that whole. It is draining.

      Gabriel Greco avatar Gabriel Greco | Jun 10, 2019 21:40:17
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