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Jun 11, 2019 13:32:18

On Rushing // On Stories

by @jimmycerone | 534 words | 🐣 | 29💌

Jimmy Cerone

Current day streak: 0🐣
Total posts: 29💌
Total words: 11566 (46 pages 📄)

I often get this constricted feeling in my chest when I rush around. Which is most every hour of the day.

I've come to realize over time that this feeling is less related to my schedule than it is my expectations and my desire to have it all. I stopped in the park to see a friend but slowly felt more and more stressed as we spoke because I wanted to see another friend and getting writing in. My own little mental plans which were by no means set in stone kept me from being present with a friend. Well they almost did. I noticed my stressy build up and let it be, which didn't make me less stressed but helped me to focus on what my friend was saying. I began to actually engage in her words. But I also ended our talk rather early, which I think was fitting.

Honestly, I'm tired of writing about expectations. I've written so much about how our expectations control us, about how my mental schedule holds me back. It's done to death I think, I'm beating a dead horse. Unless there is some miraculous new way of considering things I haven't previously pondered. To be truthful, there probably won't be for a while. Realizations come slow.


What stories do you tell yourself?

Stories are powerful, primal. They've been around as long as we have and come out in every part of our lives. Everything we know is a story. More and more I'm convinced that even our hard sciences are just stories. Evolution is a story we tell about the past. It's a scientifically backed story but a story nonetheless. So if stories can shape our view about our whole species, imagine what they do on the micro scale of ours lives...

It wasn't until recently that I realized I try to make my life fit a certain story. For some reason I'm stuck on the bad boy turned good story line. Which makes no sense because I have never ever been a bad boy and probably don't have the stomach for it, even if I agreed with the morals of such a life. Yesterday I realized almost all of the media I consume relates to this central story line. I listen to G-Eazy and Token and love the movie Logan. I'm a sucker for books like the King Killer Chronicles, which tells the tale of a young man whose life gets turned upside down and finds his way through daring feats and storytelling. I want to be this character in this story I've made up. There's only one problem. I'll never be that character and that story will never be my story.

This is not to say we can't learn from stories that aren't ours. But we can't become and embody stories that aren't ours. I will forever be a white male who grew up in a privileged suburb with parents who did their best for me. That's my story and acting like it's not doesn't do me any favors. I don't think it's a particularly cool story, but hell maybe it can one day become compelling if I figure out how to own it.

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    @jimmycerone The stories you talk about are archetypal stories and belong to us all, regardless of group identity. We all have a foe to face and a battle to win, without exception. It is our duty to fight the good fight - if we're not fighting, we're not living.

    Gabriel Greco avatar Gabriel Greco | Jun 11, 2019 22:52:39
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      @gabrielgreco Where do you think the stories come from?

      Jimmy Cerone avatar Jimmy Cerone | Jun 12, 2019 20:30:16
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      @jimmycerone They are passed down over generations until all that is left is the essential - which is also why they are so similar. So maybe the answer to your question is, from within us.

      Gabriel Greco avatar Gabriel Greco | Jun 13, 2019 16:02:12
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      @gabrielgreco Just curious - where do you get this idea? I know Peterson has done some work with it and that Jung talks about stories as well...

      Jimmy Cerone avatar Jimmy Cerone | Jun 13, 2019 11:29:15
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      @jimmycerone I'd listened to some of Peterson's lectures on mythology in his Maps of Meaning course and a lot of those elements are there. I mean, in many ways it is also pretty self-evident. You look at different cultures across the ages and there is a striking similarity in the themes of their ancient stories; foundation and folk myths and so on. So you've got to wonder where exactly in us does this tendency to gravitate towards the same themes come from?

      This is a good lecture on mythological representations: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Owgc63KhcL8

      Gabriel Greco avatar Gabriel Greco | Jun 14, 2019 01:49:46
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      @gabrielgreco Thank you for sharing! The more I look into these stories I think you are right. On a Tim Ferris podcast I was listening to yesterday with Jerry Colonna, Jerry said we are all looking for safety, love, and belonging. Do you think that's the thread that holds all these stories together?

      Jimmy Cerone avatar Jimmy Cerone | Jun 16, 2019 12:24:48
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      @jimmycerone I'm hardly an authority on any of this. I do think that people have an inclination to tribalism. The tribe was always the tight-knit group offering, safety, love, and belonging to the early human animal. I don't think this is the single thread, but an important one for sure.

      Gabriel Greco avatar Gabriel Greco | Jun 18, 2019 01:24:26
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      @gabrielgreco do you think tribalism is bad? I have to wonder if it can be done in a healthy way because I feel like localism is so key to creating a better, safer world...

      Jimmy Cerone avatar Jimmy Cerone | Jun 30, 2019 11:16:27
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      @jimmycerone Good question...I think it's more of a case that tribalism cannot be helped. It's like an evolutionary gene we all carry. Everywhere around us people form tribes. At school, at work, even within families. We are drawn to others but we are not drawn to everyone.
      What do you mean by 'localism' though? How does that work within the current framework of laws, institutions, the governments which set the rules for society..?

      Gabriel Greco avatar Gabriel Greco | Jun 30, 2019 23:14:56
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      @gabrielgreco I think localism is like intentional tribalism. Especially in today's world where everything and everyone has become so disconnected localism is like a return to our homes and our communities in creative, growth minded ways.

      Jimmy Cerone avatar Jimmy Cerone | Jul 01, 2019 14:47:58
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