I regularly take notes of my thoughts, particularly lessons I think I've learnt. Whenever I'm processing some emotion I eventually get to a point where I can note what the lesson to be taken from it is. Some are things I've always known but needed a reminder. Others are new revelations to myself.
Here's a few I've noted so far this year.
"You can't control other people's actions and feelings. there's no point in trying to change how someone might act."
I wrote a full post about this but I've slowly begun to accept the limits of my control and accepting the choices others make.
"Because it’s okay to feel things. And be who you are about them."
This is a quote from the Perks of being a Wallflower and I really needed it when I read it. I expanded my thoughts on it here.
"Everyone is big. You don't have to save anyone."
I'm not sure the phrase "everyone is big" translates. In Trinidadian dialect, it basically means that everyone is old enough and in control of their actions. I've always felt a responsibility to help others where I can but in some cases, you just have to let people be.
"Be yourself and know that that's good enough"
A simple message. But so easy to lose sight of. This comes from an interlude on Frank Ocean's Blonde.
"I have to remember I'm a human being and no one gives a fuck about the stupid things I obsess over. We all make mistakes, say dumb things, and have awkward moments. All that matters is that you're a good person and kind to people."
This is my favourite so far and pretty self-explanatory.
Sometimes I look back at these lessons months later and think, well that's wrong. But it helps to reflect on how your thought process evolves over time. Sometimes a lesson might only be valuable for a particular point in your life and you replace it as you grow.