I actually do not know how to phrase it in English to describe the phenomena as mentioned in the title 'helping to raise a kid', which has a nuance that one who is not supposed to involved the activity, but volunterily add some support as an extra. This is different from the involvement that was expected. So it would be appreciated if you could help me to identify what are the right words so that I could search other blogs and artcles about this topic further.
One of the wrong mentalities that husbands tend to have is that they think they "help" raising a child when they did even a small fraction of chore jobs like taking care of diapers, cradling a kid, feeding a bottle of milk etc. They saw that husbands did not involve raising a child in their parents' generation, and had impression that men only focus on working. I heard that my dad was like that. He focused on working late, and not being at home when my mom needs some helps. (Not always for my dad I assume and I had good memory that my dad spent his time on playing with me.)
I do not brame my parents' generation here. Here I would like to warn myselft not to forget that raising a child is the right, and the expected involvement for both mother and father equally. So I should not think I "help" my wife or do great job if I got involved with taking care of my child. This is my rights as well as responsibility.
Word of the day: bower, a pleasant shady place
I tried to establish new routine to post this in the morning to invest my time to my most important customer. Accomplished on Day 1.