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May 13, 2019 14:19:24

Emotional intelligence (EQ)

by @monolesan | 386 words | 🐣 | 171πŸ’Œ

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Emotional intelligence is the capability to understand your own emotions, emotions, and intentions of other people, the capability to control your own emotions.

Our decision making, achieving and setting goals, solving problems, reaction to different situations are depending on the level of emotional intelligence. People with high emotional intelligence are more successful and less prone to drug dependence. 

In 2012 was a study examined  EQ, self-esteem and marijuana dependence. Out of a sample of 200, 100 of whom depended on cannabis and other 100 emotionally healthy, the depend group scored exceptionally low on EQ and self-esteem compared with the healthy group.

Model of EQ

There are three kinds of models: ability, trait and mixed. The mixed model is the most popular and suggested by Danial Goleman. This model contains:

Self-awareness β€” the ability to understand one's emotions
Self-regulation β€” controlling one's disruptive emotions and impulses
Social skill β€” managing relationships
Empathy β€” feel other people's feelings
Motivation β€” being driven to achieve for the sake of achievement

But this model has been criticized in the research literature as mere "pop psychology".

Signs of low emotional intelligence

You are not stressing resistance

You don't recognize your emotions and when they come. It gives you stress. High EQ allows you to control stress and recognize negative emotions. 

You have a low score of assertiveness

Assertiveness is the capability to be independent of other's opinions and be responsible for your own decisions and behavior. It's when a human knows their rights, can say "no" and "I don't have to you and you don't have to me".

You don't know your triggers
Triggers are situations and people that call negative emotions.

Your emotion vocabulary is low
A human with low EQ says that they are "bad", a human with high EQ can say angry, upset, nervous, etc.

You don't be vexed (angry)
Negative emotions are one of the basic emotions. Emotions are human's view on situations, it regulates our life. So when you don't be angry, you can't improve things that make you feel bad.

You often feel that your companion doesn't understand you right
The inability to understand one's emotions, don't allow you to share your emotions and thoughts with other people.

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Emotional intelligence can be developed. In the next articles, I will tell how to develop EQ and about assertiveness and emotions.

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