I always feel a little weird around my birthday. I'm not exactly sure what it is and it's not easy to reflect with the barrage of phone calls, push notifications and celebratory wishes of friends throughout the day. Every year there are major events that happen but I never feel like I have done enough.
I don't know if my expectations are set by me or others and even after an extraordinary year I can't help but feel a little down.
After thinking about this throughout the day I think I know what it is. It's that I don't have a clear path of where I am going next. I have reached the professional goal that I set years ago in college and now I am just idle with no hyperdrive towards the next level.
Of course, I have the normal goals of moving up in my career but my original goal, one that was distilled in me from my family was more or less, exceeding the income of my parents growing up. I had firmly planted a flag to become a working professional with a skill set I love and enjoy while making a healthy wage. Ever since that work seems pretty linear and i'm not sure what interests me the most to move on to the next level.