In my last two posts I've talked about how I want to work on changing my habits to improve my life.
One of the habits I am hoping to incorporate is daily writing. Which is why I am here writing this right now.
Just before sitting down to write this I took one of my dogs out for a walk and found myself thinking about what I wanted to write today. This line of thinking eventually led me to consider why I want to write at all? What is the purpose and what needs does it serve? Why am I interested in writing at all?
As a child I was obsessed with books. I learnt to read quickly and voraciously. My parents always laugh when they tell me about a particular book I was obsessed with, I cannot remember the book or the name of the author, but apparently I wanted to get inside that book, I wanted to be in the story and I wanted to be friends with the main character.
When I got a bit older I remember writing out the scripts of my favourite films, word for word. I devised tally charts and marked down every time a particular character swore, or said a particular phrase.
I remember being given permission to sit inside my primary school during break time so I could work on my 'novel', a piece of appauling fan-fiction of The Babysitter's Club series of books, which I was also completly besotted with.
As a child I wrote plays and put on performances for my teachers, school friends and neighbours. I once organised a 'showcase' of singing / dancing and acting for my best friend's Nan's care home.
As I got older I stopped any imaginative, fictional play and by 12 I started keeping a regular faithful diary. I have continued this practise until the present day. I have boxes upon boxes of old diaries, gathering dust on top of my wardrobe. I felt compelled to write as a teenager, but I was largely only concerned with writing about myself, unsuprisingly.
My love of books and words led me to study English Literature at University. However, after completing my MA I turned away from English to study Psychology and later pursue a career working for the Government in Law Enforcement. Books and Literature couldn't have been further away from that world of fugitives and investigators.
Throughout my studies in Psychology and my later career I continued to read and collect books with an insatiable appetite. I read more than anyone else I have ever known.
I have been saved by books over and over again. I have found comfort, friendship and strength in them whenever I have needed it. Virginia Woolf held my hand when I walked through the streets of London, feeling small and insignificant. Sylvia Plath dried my tears when I was left heartbroken and alone; again. JK Rowling made me smile when I was sure I could never smile again.
This is what brings me here. The power of words. That a person can be saved by words.
I want to write daily because I want to write. I want to find a way of communicating the things that I have thought and felt and learned. I want to send my voice out there into the Universe so that maybe, one day, even long after I am gone, my words could bring friendship to some other lonely soul.