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Jul 21, 2019 23:22:08

One week in the 100 club, then out

by @5plus6 | 351 words | 🐣 | 239💌

5plus6

Current day streak: 0🐣
Total posts: 239💌
Total words: 56973 (227 pages 📄)

@brianball @brandonwilson @jasonleow @seunoyebode @basilesamel @knight @efran

Thank you for your congratulations for my 100th streak a week ago. 

Now, please congrats me again: I start over from 1.

At first, it's an accident caused by my phone. I explained the reason to @basilesamel and he agreed to save it back.

But I give up. I have to start over.

My feeling is quite complex after achieving 100.

A long post was planned to publish, but I broke it into pieces of replies. If you connect them into one (like a puzzle), my suffering is clear:

Look, my profile is I'm "stuck to make hard choices", so I have to write down the things happening on me. (@efran)

I force myself to slow down, otherwise, I would reply too many "easy thanks". Thanks for reading one piece of my life, and encouraging me to improve the whole. (@brianball)

Besides achieving 100 streaks in discipline, I have unlocked so many motivations to be a better human. (@basilesamel)

There are growing in writing, creating more memories, exploring more possibilities. I'm not finding myself here, instead, I create my ideal one here. (@brandonwilson)

I'm in a stage recovering from depression and creating an ideal self. But, I have to remind me every day: 'record' in 100% honesty of my current self version, other than playing with the words to 'create' a perfect one. (@knight)

May I ask how did you feel when you get your first 100? The night after checking so many notifications from others (since there are links in the post), I slept in happy but woke up by a nightmare of anxiety: what to write tomorrow? (@jasonleow)

So do you see the problem? It's "falling too far in love with my wins".

Actually, I don't lack inspirations to write every day, what I do is to pick one.

My choices always end in the most "pleasant" one, which could enhance the impression that "I'm good at ..." for readers.

I am in the danger to cross the line: playing with the words to 'create' a perfect self.

Now, stop!

From 5plus6's collection:

  • 🙌 2
  • 1

    @5plus6 nice! I'd come to follow a principle, that whatever that keeps you writing is a good thing. Sir Abe also asked if 200wad is a place for one to show, or a place to grow. If the streak isn't working out for you due to the "show" aspect and you prefer to "grow", then breaking it sounds like a good thing. Looking forward to seeing how this helps you grow further! ;)

    Jason Leow avatar Jason Leow | Jul 22, 2019 19:56:50
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    @5plus6 Love the mindset! That's the way to go about it :) The streak doesn't matter as much as the benefits you gain from writing.

    Basile Samel avatar Basile Samel | Jul 22, 2019 06:39:20
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    @5plus6 Keep going.

    Brandon Wilson avatar Brandon Wilson | Jul 21, 2019 18:29:43
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    @5plus6 ya I found that yesterday and worry for you, thank god nothing happen to you.
    way to go for start again. 大破大立 !

    Knight avatar Knight | Jul 22, 2019 06:28:46
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    @5plus6 - I don't see it as starting over -- I may be in the minority here. The writing is for you - enjoy the days you make space for it and don't worry about days taken with other parts of life. It's all good.

    Brian Ball avatar Brian Ball | Jul 21, 2019 09:33:35
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      @brianball thank you. For me it's starting over: I stop picking what to write on "this post would make my reader think I'm smart or hard working or thoughtful..."

      It has been my motivation to reach 100 streakers, but really uncomfortable for 101-105.

      5plus6 avatar 5plus6 | Jul 22, 2019 00:51:30
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      @5plus6 - that feels like a breakthrough. One more layer of the onion peeled.

      Brian Ball avatar Brian Ball | Jul 21, 2019 10:48:28
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    Such a relief that I speak it out finally!

    5plus6 avatar 5plus6 | Jul 21, 2019 23:27:22
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