At my second year of college, I was asked to participate in a math competition when I haven't written a paper before and had no ideas about "mathematic models". But I finished the competition successfully and gained the second reward. It's not because I have the talent or I am good at writing. The only reason is that I am good at searching, which my friends called "searching quotient".
Good at searching related information to answer a new question to hide my ignorance is not an ability that I am very proud of. It's more seemed like a solution for the emergency but not a capability to learning new skills. I feel nervous that I am always asked to do something unfamiliar since I make it a guarantee that I would search, organize and learn it from the time I was assigned to so so. Most of the time, I really do a great job meeting the requirement finally. But one task ends in searching means you have no chance to comprehend it further. My browser history and bookmarks are full of new websites I searched before, but none of them have been read later.
I am exhausted for searching, searching, searching ...... in order to get my work done. When there is a new question I have not known before, I hope I could answer it based on my own view from my accumulated knowledge other than searching it through the internet blindly.